My problem right now...

[teppeiahn1]

Lets just start off by saying ever since i was a little kid, I was very competetive. If i loose in a board/ card game, I would cry. I am 16 right now and I play a whole lots of tennis. My problem is that I get mad easily only when im playing tennis. When I say mad, please dont think of me throwing my raquet because thats 1 thing I would never do. I try my best to keep my cool in check, but sometimes, if I miss an easy shot, I blue out some thing like DAMN!! like realy loud. I dont get angry if the opponent hits a clean winner from baseline though.. lol.

Anyways, today I played a guy and I was up 5-0. Hes a solid 4.5 male tournament player and has alot of experience. As I was up, he started to come back and unntill 5-3 I kept my cool but after he broke me twice, I snapped. Tennis wasnt abotu having fun anymore, it was all about winning.

Thats how I been feeling lately. All I want to do is win win win. Oviously,its not a bad thing but I take it to the extreme. Ive tried many times to not do anything like bluring out realy loud but nothing has worked. Any motivation to keep me from doing this ?

Right now, This is not a HUGE problem, but looking about 10 years from now, it might be something very negative.

 

[Wes_Loves_Dunlop]

competitiveness is a good thing to have.
just learnto control it.
try talking to yourself saying encouraging things or giving advice to yourself.

 

[120mphBodyServe]

You need to start seeing competition as a challenge, and not as a threat. This is why you're getting mad/emotional/frustrated...
There's no rational or logical reason to get mad about losing a tennis match. Sounds like you are focusing WAY TOO MUCH on the result and not enough on the process, and it sounds like you don't know how to enjoy yourself in a competitive situation.
Try to have fun and take something positive out of a win or loss?
It's all a learning experience...

 

[teppeiahn1]

Thx guys. You are correct, I am focosing way too much on the result instead of the process. The reason to that I think is because for now, I havent playing tennis that long. Everyone I know tells me you achieved alot over a very short period of time. And lately, getting better is starting to become alot harder for me. Thats why I want to ensure myself that I am getting better because when I win a tough set, I feel like Ive improved just a little. I can not prove to you what rating I am but I call myself a 4.5 . It was fairly easy for to to become a 4.0 but then the going from a 4.5 to a 5.5 is alot harder. I think one of the rerason is I play too much tennis. I think ill take a breeze

 

[fuzz nation]

I've coached high school players in your age bracket for a few years and one thing that has become obvious to me is how important it is for someone of your age to seriously work on good psychology. You already have some good tools to work with, but if you're getting mad as you describe, you're mentally checking out for who knows what reason.

Getting p-o'ed at yourself like that is a decision, but it's not necessarily such a conscious thing. You might benefit greatly from learning about your own "mechanisms" so that you can stop that angry distraction from seeping into your matches. It could be something as simple as defining your own expectations and getting them more in tune with reality. After all, it's safe to say that you're going to miss at least one more easy shot in your career, right? No sense in getting derailed over it, yet we all know it can happen.

The dramatic reactions don't help you to play the way you want, but it's a bit of a process to understand them for what they are and avoid them. Remember that when you get mad, you're concentrating on what you're doing wrong and it's too easy to repeat those mistakes when you're fixated on them. I've gotten a lot of help from reading some of Vic Braden's work, but there are plenty of good sources out there that can help to keep your head in focus. Do that and you can play up closer to your potential - and that's really what it's all about.

Now that you've put a decent skill set together, you'll need to put in significant work to keep making gains. Once you get more comfortable with what we call "the process" of the day to day grind, the up's and down's won't be so strange as long as you keep your eye on the horizon. Only with occasional setbacks can you learn and progress toward those long term goals. Don't be afraid to condition your head along with the rest of you.