What Exactly Do I Say?

[Cindysphinx]

I think I am not going to invite a player to return to our 6.5 combo team. I need some big-time advice on what to say. Usually in these situations, I just start talking and all manner of crap comes out. Maybe some advance thinking will help?

Our situation is that our 6.5 winter combo team finished second in the flight this spring. For the fall, our goal will be to try to win the division (or at least beat a team that has always beaten us). We don't wish to do anything radical to achieve this goal; there is no post-season for fall combo anyway. I'm fine with continuing to play everyone equally.

I have 10 3.0 players on the team. One is crazy-weak. She and I have been on the same team since 2006, first as teammates on a horrid team. I invited her to join when I started a new 5.5 combo team, and she has been on it since.

We are not close friends, but she is nice, reliable, available. She cannot practice because her own mother is ailing. She is getting older and does not play the steady tennis she used to play. She might be having back trouble, as she cannot move. She cannot ever come to practice. I suspect the only time she touches a racket is during her team matches.

This winter, her 6.5 combo partners complained about her weakness. This surprised me, as she had always been very steady in the past and usually won her matches. I put myself with her for one 6.5 match, and it was horrific. I about killed myself trying to cover the whole court, and still we went down 6-3, 6-3. I saw what the others were complaining about.

I spoke to the player who took over my old 3.0 team (including the weak player) for the spring. My hope was the new captain would say she had done better at 3.0. No such luck. The new captain said she had the same trouble in that no one was happy playing with this weak player and she didn't know what to do with her either.

Bottom line: I think I need to tell this weak player that I am not going to invite her back for the fall combo season. The inability to find partners for her is a total deal killer. And frankly, she is much better off having to find a new team now than in January 2009 because she would do very well on a 5.5 combo team, which will likely exist in the fall but not in the spring (when November ratings bumps result in a dearth of 2.5 players).

I've never cut anyone loose before. I do not know what to say. I feel like it must be a phone call (although I would far prefer to do it via e-mail). So what exactly do I say?

I hate this.

Cindy -- who would normally ask her husband to make the call because he is way better at this sort of thing

 

[Nellie]

Is there anyway your sugarcoat it - such as to say that the team has too many 3.0 and needs to add some 3.5's?

 

[Douggo]

Whatever you say, kudos to you for saying it. I was once cut loose via my captain simply ignoring my emails. By the time he told me "oh, we have enough guys", I was unable to catch on with anybody else.

 

[spot]

has everyone been told that this team will be going from social to competitive? Or is this something that the upper people have mentioned with each other but hasn't been sent out to everyone else on the team?

 

[moonbat]

Is there anyway your sugarcoat it - such as to say that the team has too many 3.0 and needs to add some 3.5's?

Oooh, that's a good one, Nellie! Cindy, you have aother choice: Tell the truth---that your 6.5 team is going to be super competitive this year and that you think her skills are best suited for a 5.5 team. If you have a 5.5 team to put her on, all the better. Thank her for all her hard work and tell her that you really appreciated her team spirit. I would think that she's well aware of her partners' unhappiness, and would have a much easier time on a 5.5 team.
If she's totally clueless, at least you've clued her in gently. Good luck!

 

[spot]

If it were my team I would tell her that with the team deciding to transition into being competitive then playing time will be more allocated by merit. And that she can stay on the team as a sub and still go to practice but that you don't think she is going to make the lineup unless she improves. That way you aren't kicking her off the team- you are just giving her the choice of finding another team that might fit her goals better. And if she isn't practicing then she just doesn't have a reason to be on a team that isn't going to play her a lot.

 

[moonbat]

If it were my team I would tell her that with the team deciding to transition into being competitive then playing time will be more allocated by merit. And that she can stay on the team as a sub and still go to practice but that you don't think she is going to make the lineup unless she improves. That way you aren't kicking her off the team- you are just giving her the choice of finding another team that might fit her goals better. And if she isn't practicing then she just doesn't have a reason to be on a team that isn't going to play her a lot.

Good point. The fact that she never comes to practice can be used as a reason why she can't be on the team this year. Spot, I could be wrong, but if this is USTA, every person on the team has to play at least twice in order for the team to win the division, so having her as a "sub" won't work if she's required to play at least twice.

 

[spot]

I captain for a different league than USTA- for us a player isn't playoff eligible unless they play at least twice but there is no problem at all with having someone on the roster who doesn't make the lineup. I mean what do you do if you have someone that gets injured and can't play a second time!?

 

[moonbat]

I captain for a different league than USTA- for us a player isn't playoff eligible unless they play at least twice but there is no problem at all with having someone on the roster who doesn't make the lineup. I mean what do you do if you have someone that gets injured and can't play a second time!?

I think you have to supply some evidence of the injury. Besides, I think Cindy doesn't want her to play even once.

 

[Crusher10s]

Find that Big, Bad 3.5 Backbone to go along with that Big, Bad 3.5 game and tell her the truth.

 

[atatu]

You could try this, send out an email "to the team" indicating that you are blindcopying everyone (when actually she is the only one getting the email) and say Ok, the team is gonig to be very competitive from now on, only people who want to practice, etc. but we have a tight roster, so I'm sending this email out to see if there is anyone who does not want to play next season, but would prefer to look for a less competitive team...she might get the message and just drop out. If not, you're out of luck.

 

[PushyPushster]

Do it like Dr. Evil did it in 'Goldmember'. He's on the sub, with his crew, and then announces, "Everyone must leave!" As people get up to go, he starts making exceptions.

Dr. Evil: "Goldmember, you can stay. Henchman at the radar, you can stay. Guy holding the wrench, you can stay ..."

Eventually, he's named everyone but Mini-me, who remains clueless.

Dr. Evil: "Oh my, this is awkward ..."

Get together your entire team and start out with the announcement, "I'm disbanding the whole squad. Wait ... #1 Singles, you can stay ..."

 

[wao]

It is never an easy thing to do, and most would aviod the situation so I give you credit for trying to make your team stronger, while understanding and being compasionate to her family issues. I would think that based on her win/losses, she feels that others on the team are stronger players. You have mentioned on other threads the desire to build a more competitive team and am sure that you have communicated that to your team. I would start the conversation by "in an effort to strengthen the team giving I wanted to let you know that you might want to consider looking into a 5.0 level team if they have such a thing. IMO your honesty and leting her know in advance will be appriciated. Good luck
Wayne

 

[Fedace]

WOW, that is pretty cutthroat. dumping a player that has been with you for years. i have a team myself though i am not the captain. we are trying to improve our team so we added 3-4 really good players so we have one too many guys on the team. even then our captain is not even dreaming about dropping guys that has been with us for years that still wants to be on the team. Just be tactful when playing the weak players. What we do is put them on at limited basis and when we do put them in, we put them at #3 doubles with strong player, just to help them out and not put too much pressure on the strong player to carry the load. if you do this, the weak player generally get the message. they know, you can't do this all the time and they will have limited amount of play. this is sold of understood without saying.

 

[MariaS]

Cindy,

Cindy -- who would normally ask her husband to make the call because he is way better at this sort of thing

What the heck could your husband say to her instead of you?
"My wife is a wimp, and she asked me to call you...." :?

 

[Cindysphinx]

has everyone been told that this team will be going from social to competitive? Or is this something that the upper people have mentioned with each other but hasn't been sent out to everyone else on the team?

Spot, we're way past the competitive v. social thing. We finished second last season; we will finish at the top this season. Our goals haven't changed at all.

This lady plays 2.5 tennis on a 6.5 team. She simply cannot get a ball back. I mean, in our match together, I did things like tell her don't worry about anything other than protecting her ally. They *still* passed her up the alley. If any shot is farther away from her than the length of her arm + her racket, it is a winner.

Really, the problem is that we *do* play everyone equally. That is why we need everyone to be able to play *some.* Sure, I could keep her on the team and just not play her. That's not fair to her, is it? She pays her team fees, so she is entitled to play.

Spot's idea of telling her that playing time will be based on merit is interesting. I have a problem with it because it is not true. I would touch off a panic if I sent such a message to the whole team. I could tell her that that she won't play unless she demonstrates improvement in practice, but she's welcome to be on the roster.

Yeah, it feels cutthroat and mean, but it isn't. We aren't making some crazy effort to win the division. It's just that her skills have eroded so dramatically over the last few years that no one wants to play with her.

Not even me. I mean, without this woman, we still have several women whose tennis is shaky and with whom some players won't play. I will be partnering with those women, and even then it will be a struggle. I think it is good for me to have to try to carry someone. There are limits though. Even for me.

 

[spot]

ah- I see now. I thought that when you said you guys were going for the division that you were having a team philosophy change and you were getting rid of the "everyone plays equally" thing. No- my idea doesn't work at all if its "everyone plays equally but her".

In then end I don't think that there is any way for you to avoid being the bad guy in this. She sounds like a really nice person and a good friend who just has been passed up by the rest of the team. I don't think that you have any choice but to just be honest and straight up with her. But yeah- the fact that you are a team that plays everyone equally makes this 10x as hard.

Does she realize how much she has been passed up by the rest of the team skill wise?

 

[flash9]

Is she a 2.5 or a 3.0?

I have 10 3.0 players on the team. One is crazy-weak.

This lady plays 2.5 tennis on a 6.5 team. She simply cannot get a ball back.

So, is she a 3.0 or a 2.5?

If she is a 2.5 then it is much easier. You find her and face-to-face tell her that the team is a 6.5 team and the level of play is above where you feel she is competitive. She might disagree with you, but you say that you are the captain and this is how you feel. Do not lay the blame on any of your teammates! Tell her ASAP so it does give her time to look for a different team.

 

[Cindysphinx]

So, is she a 3.0 or a 2.5?

If she is a 2.5 then it is much easier. You find her and face-to-face tell her that the team is a 6.5 team and the level of play is above where you feel she is competitive. She might disagree with you, but you say that you are the captain and this is how you feel. Do not lay the blame on any of your teammates! Tell her ASAP so it does give her time to look for a different team.

She is still a 3.0 computer-rated player. Whether that will change (with her moving down to 2.5) in November I cannot predict.

It's the unusual situation where someone's skills have deteriorated such that they are now playing much weaker tennis than their computer-rating suggests.

Well, I gotta pick up the phone. Maybe I'll be a weasel and focus on where she is planning to go with her tennis and how she is feeling about it. In our match together, she apologized repeatedly and seemed to feel badly about the effort. I tried not to be mean or appear frustrated, but I totally had my hands full trying to cut off balls from wacky positions and wasn't paying too much attention to how she was holding up mentally.

 

[cak]

You might want to approach it from a safety standpoint, specifically hers. I captained a 5.5 team a few years ago and had some women on the downside of the peak. They did ok in 5.5. At the first 6.5 practice a young 3.0 nailed one of them in the face, as she didn't back off the net as fast as the 3.0 was used to. I was truely afraid in matches these women would be physically hurt, as 3.5s from other teams have no reason not to hit them. I told them they were more than welcome to come to and play at the practices and cheer us on at games, and certainly come to the team party, but I really didn't feel comfortable putting them out on the court against 20 year old 3.5s. I was worried for their safety. Some of them dropped out, one stayed on and brought the best cookies to games, and coached players between sets.

One of the saving graces in our area is the combo and super senior leagues are both late summer/fall seasons.

 

[flash9]

Now it is clear

Cindy - I do need to apologize, I just noticed you said "she plays 2.5 tennis on a 6.5 team", intending to say, "she plays at the level of a 2.5 on a 6.5 team". I misunderstood and thought you were potentially saying she was a 2.5 after earlier saying she was a 3.0.

Is she old enough to play on a Senior level team?

I think if you discuss this with her and share your concern for her safety and everyone's enjoyment it would be best for her to consider moving to a different level team.

 

[Cindysphinx]

:blink:

Senior league! Why didn't I think of that!!!!

Several of the 3.5 ladies are on senior teams. I am sure they could not use this player, but they will know captains who can use a reliable, steady (when the balls aren't coming too terribly fast, anyway) 3.0.

Yeah, CAK, the safety thing is a real issue. In the match I played with her, the opponents painted a bull's eye on her. Fortunately, they had the control not to nail her but passed her neatly instead. Not all opponents will have that control.

What I did was go ahead and send out an e-mail to the whole team seeing who is interested. That gives her the chance to decline of her own volition. If she accepts, then I'll do The Dreaded Phone Call and let her know that I'm not going to be able to guarantee her any matches as things stand, but if she can work on things in practice she might be ready. I also figured that if she really really really wants to play, I could tell her that I can schedule her against certain teams and she'll have to be flexible about her availability.

Thereby chickening out.

 

[Cindysphinx]

Cindy - I do need to apologize, I just noticed you said "she plays 2.5 tennis on a 6.5 team", intending to say, "she plays at the level of a 2.5 on a 6.5 team". I misunderstood and thought you were potentially saying she was a 2.5 after earlier saying she was a 3.0.

Is she old enough to play on a Senior level team?

I think if you discuss this with her and share your concern for her safety and everyone's enjoyment it would be best for her to consider moving to a different level team.

Oh, hey. No apology needed. I wasn't clear.

 

[ironicqueery]

I captain a women's 3.5 team, and when I don't invite players back, it's the 3.0's that I don't invite back, and I just let them know I need more 3.5 players - which is true. I also offer to help them find a 3.0 team.

 

[Xisbum]

Thereby chickening out.

This does not sound like you. Just sayin'.:???:

 

[spot]

nah- thats exactly the right way of going about it. I have been bailed out several times by people either dropping off the team on their own in situations like this. One time I wanted a player off and they just forgot to respond to my "who is coming back" email for a month or so and I had already filled his spot.

Did you at least lay the groundwork in the email by saying that the team was going to try and win the division? You start talking about goals of the team and it will be easier to talk to her later about how her level isn't up to par.

 

[Steady Eddy]

Buy a cigar. Call her into your 'office' and say, "Look kid, I like ya, see? But I don't think ya got what it takes, see? Aw gee kid, you're swell. But ya gotta move into another line a work." There will eventually be a happy ending for her, because that's what always happens on The Late Show.

 

[Cindysphinx]

nah- thats exactly the right way of going about it. I have been bailed out several times by people either dropping off the team on their own in situations like this. One time I wanted a player off and they just forgot to respond to my "who is coming back" email for a month or so and I had already filled his spot.

Did you at least lay the groundwork in the email by saying that the team was going to try and win the division? You start talking about goals of the team and it will be easier to talk to her later about how her level isn't up to par.

Yeah, I did talk about goals, but not in a heavy way. We'll see what she says . . .

 

[DaveG]

I guess it is just me but why not try the honest approach? Just tell he that everyone on the team seems to feel that her game has gotten worse, she does not come to practice, she seems to be having back problems and we just need a stronger player. That might give her the initiative to start practicing more and get back to your standards for your team and maybe can get back on next year. If it was my friend I would not want it sugar coated.

 

[spot]

Dave- if you don't think it should be sugar coated then I don't think you have spent a lot of time around women's teams.

 

[Steady Eddy]

Dave- if you don't think it should be sugar coated then I don't think you have spent a lot of time around women's teams.

We have a winner! And a realist.

 

[DaveG]

Dave- if you don't think it should be sugar coated then I don't think you have spent a lot of time around women's teams.

Yea, your right I was not considering the "women" factor

but I still think the truth is always the best way.

 

[Cindysphinx]

You know, what I've noticed on women's teams is that there seems to be a lot more anxiety in general. People are worried about their place on the team, how they are perceived, whether they measure up.

This on a team that plays everyone equally. I wonder at times whether what I see is because anxious players are attracted to a team where their position is secure, so I have a self-selecting group of anxious women.

If TFM is around he can weigh in on this, but I don't sense the same level of anxiety on our mixed team. This is so even though our captain does most everything the same way I do. Almost all of the women on the mixed team are also on my ladies team.

There are two differences between the mixed team and the ladies team that might be related to anxiety levels. One is that the mixed team tends to have more established partnerships, whereas the ladies team does not (too many issues with availability). The second is that the mixed team has always been at the same level -- 7.0 mixed. The ladies team has now been through four iterations -- 5.5 combo, 6.5 combo, 3.0 ladies, 3.5 ladies -- with each new team bringing on new players who are a "threat." Maybe that sort of upheaval every year stokes latent insecurity?

Cindy -- navel gazing this morning when she should be doing something useful

 

[ttbrowne]

This happened to me when I was coaching a men's baseball team.

I gathered the whole team and said that we were getting more serious about our game and layed the practice requirement on 'em.

I didn't ask for answers right on the spot. I asked them to think about it and I would call them.

Needless to say...the ones I wanted to drop out did.

It's why they call it a TEAM. All of you need to be doing the same thing.

 

[spot]

Cindy- from what I have seen there is just so much more that goes into women's teams. First no one wants to make their friends mad at them. Women care just as much (if not more) about their relationships with these people off the court as on the court. Men just aren't worried about on court stuff carrying over to off the court areas. (thats my big theory on why mixed is tough for some couples...) The captain of a women's team has a tough time telling a girl on their team that her level isn't up to the rest of the team, I will sit down and tell my guys exactly what needs to improve about their game if they want to make the lineup more often. These guys might not agree with my assessment, but its not going to stop us from going out and having a beer after practice.

But because women are more hesitant to talk about level openly, it leads to a whole lot more uncertainty and axiousness. People don't really know where other people think their place on the team is so they are constantly trying to protect it. Women aren't saying it to the person's face, but they are definitely talking about it when that person isn't in the room. That makes it 10x as hard in my opinion.

And as far as pairings go, women think personality type matters for their own playing style. I can put 2 guys out there together who aren't friends, but if their skills fit well then it will probably work. At least when I play mixed, I have a different personality based on all the different partners because of what they need to have out there to play well. Janet needs intensity, Caroline needs constant energy and enthusiasm and don't ever mention what the score is, Jennifer needs constant strategy, Nicole needs a foot up her ass when she gets her head out of the game- on and on. What works for one person just doesn't work for others. So there are pairings for the women's team that won't work personality wise even if they would be fine skill wise.

And women are worried that one the court stuff carries over off the court- the reverse is also true. If 2 women have an issue off the court, forget about playing them on the court together as far as I can tell.

Anyway- this is just my experience with the women's team that I am associated with and I don't claim at all that every women's team has all of this going on. But I do think there is just more involved that I don't have to deal with as a men's captain.

 

[Deleted member 23235]

Make her assistant captain, and ask her what she thinks the strongest line up should be.

 

[ProfoundBasic]

Say nothing...
She had contributed alot to the team in the past...
leave her alone...
When someone get sick ...

 

[TennisDawg]

Does she post on TW. Maybe she can go to this thread.

 

[Cindysphinx]

Cindy- from what I have seen there is just so much more that goes into women's teams. First no one wants to make their friends mad at them. Women care just as much (if not more) about their relationships with these people off the court as on the court. Men just aren't worried about on court stuff carrying over to off the court areas. (thats my big theory on why mixed is tough for some couples...) The captain of a women's team has a tough time telling a girl on their team that her level isn't up to the rest of the team, I will sit down and tell my guys exactly what needs to improve about their game if they want to make the lineup more often. These guys might not agree with my assessment, but its not going to stop us from going out and having a beer after practice.

Oh. My. God.

Do you know what would happen if I even suggested to one of my players that she needs to learn to volley better? Or needs to learn a real second serve instead of that school-girl push? Or needs to learn a half-volley?

She would be *mortally wounded.* Heck, I'm not above this myself. I didn't like it much when I was having serving woes and a practice partner told me I needed to work on my serve. That was two months ago and I am still irked.

So you really come right out with this stuff?

I'll tell you what. I could cite a glaring deficiency of all 17 of my teammates. Huge, obvious stuff that could be cured with some determination and some practice. I could tell them each privately what their issue is. And I would bet you not one of them would take it well. I mean, who am I to critique their tennis?

But because women are more hesitant to talk about level openly, it leads to a whole lot more uncertainty and axiousness. People don't really know where other people think their place on the team is so they are constantly trying to protect it. Women aren't saying it to the person's face, but they are definitely talking about it when that person isn't in the room. That makes it 10x as hard in my opinion.

Yeah, which is weird. I mean, men aren't flocking to TV shows like "The View" where people talk about . . . well, I wouldn't know. But I assume they are talking about *their feelings* and *their relationships.* Yet some of us women (myself included) go all to pieces if anyone is straight with them about glaring deficiencies in their tennis.

And as far as pairings go, women think personality type matters for their own playing style. I can put 2 guys out there together who aren't friends, but if their skills fit well then it will probably work. At least when I play mixed, I have a different personality based on all the different partners because of what they need to have out there to play well. Janet needs intensity, Caroline needs constant energy and enthusiasm and don't ever mention what the score is, Jennifer needs constant strategy, Nicole needs a foot up her ass when she gets her head out of the game- on and on. What works for one person just doesn't work for others. So there are pairings for the women's team that won't work personality wise even if they would be fine skill wise.

Now, I haven't experienced this. I haven't had any players refuse to play with someone because of personality issues. It is a nice group of ladies, so there aren't any difficult personalities.

The objections to pairings have usually been tennis-related (nobody wants to play with Suzy No-Strokes, but they like her just fine). The closest thing to a personality clash is a pretty good player who is very hard on herself and demonstrative when she makes an error. If she misses, she might make a huge, loud groan or yell. The problem is she also does this when her partner misses. It's pretty awful to miss a shot and have your own partner stomp her foot and yell "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgh!" This is affecting whether others want to partner with her. Maybe a guy would just brush this sort of thing off? I don't know.

The funny thing is that, having experienced the "Aaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrgh!" reaction from Good Player myself, I somehow can't bring myself to bring it to her attention. I should just say, "Good Player, you need to be careful about expressing your frustration when your partner makes an error. People take that stuff personally, it makes them tight, and it might make them not wish to be your partner. Better is to realize that everyone misses and just try to be supportive."

I should say it. Still haven't said it. Probably never will.

Anyway- this is just my experience with the women's team that I am associated with and I don't claim at all that every women's team has all of this going on. But I do think there is just more involved that I don't have to deal with as a men's captain.

Disclaimer duly noted.

 

[Taxvictim]

Can you printout a ranking of the wins and losses of every team member? Would it prove she is by far the weakest player?

 

[Steady Eddy]

It's pretty awful to miss a shot and have your own partner stomp her foot and yell "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgh!"Disclaimer duly noted.

Oh no! People should know that that's not accpetable for a partner. If they can't control themselves that's one thing, but they should know it's not the right thing to do. When a pitcher loads the bases and the catcher comes to the mound, do you think he tells him, "Look at the mess you've made, quit walking guys."? I think teaching pros should tell people this, there's more to tennis than strokes.

Can you printout a ranking of the wins and losses of every team member? Would it prove she is by far the weakest player?

That would add insult to injury, IMO.

 

[10sguy]

I think I am not going to invite a player to return to our 6.5 combo team. I need some big-time advice on what to say. Usually in these situations, I just start talking and all manner of crap comes out. Maybe some advance thinking will help?

Our situation is that our 6.5 winter combo team finished second in the flight this spring. For the fall, our goal will be to try to win the division (or at least beat a team that has always beaten us). We don't wish to do anything radical to achieve this goal; there is no post-season for fall combo anyway. I'm fine with continuing to play everyone equally.

I have 10 3.0 players on the team. One is crazy-weak. She and I have been on the same team since 2006, first as teammates on a horrid team. I invited her to join when I started a new 5.5 combo team, and she has been on it since.


We are not close friends, but she is nice, reliable, available. She cannot practice because her own mother is ailing. She is getting older and does not play the steady tennis she used to play. She might be having back trouble, as she cannot move. She cannot ever come to practice. I suspect the only time she touches a racket is during her team matches.

This winter, her 6.5 combo partners complained about her weakness. This surprised me, as she had always been very steady in the past and usually won her matches. I put myself with her for one 6.5 match, and it was horrific. I about killed myself trying to cover the whole court, and still we went down 6-3, 6-3. I saw what the others were complaining about.

I spoke to the player who took over my old 3.0 team (including the weak player) for the spring. My hope was the new captain would say she had done better at 3.0. No such luck. The new captain said she had the same trouble in that no one was happy playing with this weak player and she didn't know what to do with her either.

Bottom line: I think I need to tell this weak player that I am not going to invite her back for the fall combo season. The inability to find partners for her is a total deal killer. And frankly, she is much better off having to find a new team now than in January 2009 because she would do very well on a 5.5 combo team, which will likely exist in the fall but not in the spring (when November ratings bumps result in a dearth of 2.5 players).

I've never cut anyone loose before. I do not know what to say. I feel like it must be a phone call (although I would far prefer to do it via e-mail). So what exactly do I say?

I hate this.

Cindy -- who would normally ask her husband to make the call because he is way better at this sort of thing

Cindy, here's a copy/paste of the exact wording I used in a quite similar situation (specifics deleted to avoid identification):

" Despite it being a mostly summertime league (when folks are more likely to be unavailable), I'm somewhat uncomfortable with the size of our roster and the resulting lack of playing opportunities I'm envisioning for you. This isn't easy for me to write . . . but I'm doing it in the interest of fairness to you. If you'd like to reconsider, there remains the distinct possibility of joining another team* (Section rules allow that - if a player has not yet played in a league match).

Let me know how you feel about this; it's completely your choice. If you choose to remain on the team, there will be some league play opportunities for you, but they'll be limited - nowhere near like on the ***** team.

Also, I want you to know that I very much appreciate your being available for every *****'s match; that's extremely helpful for a captain. It was easier for me too, realizing that when you weren't in a lineup . . . you were being a productive member of society (working) unlike most of the rest of the ***** team!"
*********************************************************
Note: The player took it well and is now on another team.

 

[Cindysphinx]

Oooh, nice e-mail!

So you did it via e-mail, eh? I was thinking it had to be via phone, but now I'm thinking I could perhaps get away with an e-mail. . . .

Cluck, cluck, cluck.

 

[moonbat]

So...what exactly did you say?? Do tell!

 

[MariaS]

Yeah Cindy, how did you tell her she's not good enough for your team anymore....