Of Trophies And Paperweights

Discussion in 'Tennis Tips/Instruction' started by Cindysphinx, Feb 11, 2010.

  1. mtommer

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    This reminds me of the John MacEnroe video where he snipes at a spectator about how great he is.
     
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  2. Ripper014

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    I do find this forum interesting... how many are so protective of their small ponds.

    My brother always said to me he would rather be a big fish in a small pond... I guess a take off from the devil's quote about ruling in hell...

    The one thing I think we all need to do is learn to be more humble. None of us are as good as we think we are... and even if we are, we are not that good in the overall picture.
     
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  3. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    Any excuse to fire off a pointless insult. That's all it is, Rui.

    Don't sweat it. I don't. I kind of pity Drakulie, I really do. :(
     
    #53
  4. Topaz

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    Very nice!

    It is selfish to set a personal goal and then work hard to attain it (or least try your best to get there)?

    Gosh, guess I'll just retire to the couch then. :roll:

    I haven't seen anyone on here throwing their trophies in anyone's face. Nope, not at all. What I have seen, repeatedly, are those who *think* they are better belittle the accomplishments of others. That is what got this particular thread started.
     
    #54
  5. OrangePower

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    In the grand scheme of things, you're right. Winning at tennis at the recreational level is not exactly the pinnacle of achievement.

    But lighten up a little. We set many goals for ourselves. Some are maybe more meaningful, like building a successful career, getting involved in social causes, being a good husband/wife, etc. Some are more trivial, like getting better at tennis. But there is satisfaction to be had in achieving even the more trivial goals.

    I agree that winning trophies just to claim that you're better than other people would be a sorry thing. But for some winning a trophy is just an affirmation that they are getting a little better at something that they enjoy doing. Nothing wrong with that.
     
    #55
  6. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    Cindy has 2 daughters at least, that I know of. She may have many more children, I don't know :)
     
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  7. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    And we are supposed to believe you are homeless. Are you homeless by choice? You mentioned somewhere that you give tennis lessons to attractive woman. And of course you post analysis of tennis techniques like some professor. Haven't heard of homeless people who do such things.
     
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  8. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    Here's a pic of me with two of my daughters:

    [​IMG]

    The other six are on the floor nearby.
     
    #58
  9. Topaz

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    LOLOL...good one Cindy!
     
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  10. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    They are due to super-fertility drugs.
     
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  11. drakulie

    drakulie Talk Tennis Guru

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    I'm responding to her entire post.

    then I suppose in your world, their is nothing to be proud of and no one really accomplishes any achievements.



    I'm quite certain you do, in the same way you pity your kids for being proud of anything they do.
     
    #61
  12. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    I will hate the day when I have to play in age groups. I still get hits in with junior players and want to keep it that way. They become better and move on, I stay where I am.

    But soon I will not have a say about this. The only people who will seek me out will be my age or older. It is already happening in the workplace, why would outside be any different?
     
    #62
  13. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    There is a lesson in this thread. I realize and have always known that I don't appreciate my son's progress in school. I have the tendency to "telescope" everything, assuming that things which have become obvious to me over the years should also be obvious to him. I am impatient with his learning curve. I want to be discussing with him at my level, not his. So I never appreciate what he is doing.
     
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  14. LeeD

    LeeD Bionic Poster

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    Always enjoy the JOURNEY, while looking forwards towards the destination.
    Life can be too short to complete the destination, but you always have the journey for your history.
     
    #64
  15. sureshs

    sureshs Bionic Poster

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    What is the destination?
     
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  16. mtommer

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    In the real world, it's usually only the one who achieves something and some close relatives or friends who care. Don't expect others to care one iota or expect your accomplishment to be anything substantial or beyond ordinary. To them, you're just one of thousands to have done the exact same thing, nothing special. One's percieved value of the accomplishment is only dimished by others if you seek their approval in the first place. For someone who doesn't care what others think of them, they can be quite happy with their accomplishment, even if it is seen as rather ordinary by everyone else.

    Or in other words:

    You're little "summary" here is a load of baloney and isn't even remotely what people are really saying. Get a clue context king.
     
    #66
  17. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    Aw, don't be so hard on yourself. It sounds like you're doing your best, which is probably better than you think.

    That said, it is surprising at times as a parent when your kid can't do something you find to be easy. And yes, it does require a ton of patience, especially if they have issues and challenges you do not have.
     
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  18. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    Dude, that was English, but just barely! :) :)

    Cindy -- who would keep a tutor in the payroll if her kids wrote like *that*
     
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  19. Ripper014

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    Is it "in" or "on" the payroll...?
     
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  20. Ripper014

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    The destination is being able to look back on the journey and thinking that you lived it to the fullest and shared it with the people you cared the most for.
     
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  21. JavierLW

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    I dont have friends who get upset at terms like "lower level" and bend over backwards to try to make themselves look good because they are so vane that they take it as some sort of insult....
     
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  22. GuyClinch

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    The low level trophies are participation trophies for the most part. I don't think anyone cares if you win - but you have a little memento indicating that you really like tennis. And that's not a bad thing to have. Though I prefer a t-shirt to a trophy because it's more realistic (as to the value of that victory and its more functional). The only contest I won though was a soft-tennis contest - won 80 bucks and a t-shirt which was pretty sweet. But that's because no one plays soft tennis..I supsect haha. Though honestly I seem like really good at soft tennis way better then regular tennis.. I digress.

    Also people can be personally proud of things they accomplish that are outside their talent sphere. Some 3.5s players are pretty poor athletes - so winning a trophy is something they can in fact be proud of. Again its not saying so much "I am an awesome tennis player" but a sign of commitment and overcome some adversity..
     
    Last edited: Feb 12, 2010
    #72
  23. LuckyR

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    No, just run of the mill fertility drugs and a super-idiot Infertility doc.
     
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  24. Ripper014

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    Ouch.... soooooooooooooo... at what level do trophies mean something then..?
     
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  25. Ripper014

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    Maybe it has nothing to do with drugs... maybe just a really fertile donor or persistent practice. Cindy does seem like someone who keeps at something til it is done right.
     
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  26. GuyClinch

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    Heh. That's a pretty feel good explanation. I say this - your going to turn to dust anyway so you might as well have fun doing it. If winning some low level trophy is fun - go for it!
     
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  27. Ripper014

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    I am done competing for trophies... and I play higher than a 3.5 level, I was just wondering at what level you felt trophies became important?
     
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  28. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    You want eight babies, you Do eight dudes.

    That's how it works, right?
     
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  29. Ripper014

    Ripper014 Hall of Fame

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    lol..................... so where does the line start?
     
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  30. drakulie

    drakulie Talk Tennis Guru

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    spoken like a person who has never achieved anything in their life.

    Nah, judging by your attitude, you could care less if your kids were educated, or dumb slobs. I would guess they are the latter, and under "achievers" with a bunch of suspensions from school you use as wall paper in your broken down home.
     
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  31. mtommer

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    Spoken like maybe but unfortunately not spoken by. But then, achievements are all subjective now aren't they?

    And he still harps on meanings no one here is putting forth. Context King in full effect! You go boooiiiii!
     
    #81
  32. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    Nah. My kids *rock!* You'd adore them. We're not done yet, but so far so good.

    Now, about my house . . . I would really love to do the master bath -- 1958 peach tile, gah! -- but it seems a little irresponsible to spend money on new tile right now.

    But, uh . . . Thanks for asking! :)

    Cindy -- who would wonder where she had gone wrong if her kids ever got onto a discussion board and behaved like Drakulie
     
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  33. drakulie

    drakulie Talk Tennis Guru

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    You'd be dissapointed they aren't out on the street selling crack.
     
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  34. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    : snicker:

    Well, *someone* is on crack, clearly!

    And dude, it's spelled "disappointed." If you're going to suggest someone's kids are stupid, you need to pay attention to the wavy red line under what you type.

    Dang.
     
    #84
  35. Larrysümmers

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    Jesus tap dancing Christ Drakulie. A little harsh don't ya think. You act like you are 12 with your insaults. You are not even attacking cindy. You're attacking her kids. At least her kids are not on the Internet trying to prove how big their balls are. That is exactly what you are doing. You are acting like a 5th grader picking on a 2nd grader.
    What next drakulie? Going to start attacking her parents?
    I would not be suprissed if you started to.
     
    #85
  36. Ripper014

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    Ripper just sitting here scratching his head wondering how old everyone is.

    I always thought that this forum needed a live IM function so we could discuss things live, seeing posts like this I am not so sure. But then things would move along at a much quicker pace and so would a potential resolution.

    RESOLUTION...??? Who am I kidding... lol
     
    #86
  37. mtommer

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    Well I'm about two but haven't you noticed how much fun two year olds are? :mrgreen:
     
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  38. Ripper014

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    2 I can deal with... when they approach 3 and 4 my patience starts to wear thin, and then again there are the teen years... and here I have never been a parent. But I hear Cindy is taking applications...
     
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  39. drakulie

    drakulie Talk Tennis Guru

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    oh, brother. Now you're checking typos? :roll: Desperation at it's finest coming from someone who doesn't care about achievements.

    By the way, since we are checking grammar here, let me help you out a bit.

    And dude, it's spelled "disappointed."

    And dude, it's spelled, "disappointed".



    No, I'm clearly attacking her for being the type of parent that would suggest "achievements are no big deal".
     
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  40. Topaz

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    It's? Or Its???

    Where is Xenakis when you need him???
     
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  41. Ripper014

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    No he got it right... it's as in "it is".
     
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  42. Topaz

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    ^^^I always mix that one up!
     
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  43. Steady Eddy

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    Lately I've started an exercise regimen to get in better shape. While that might be laudable, it's also selfish. Selfish isn't always bad you know.

    What does one do with trophies? Build a shrine in your house and show them to visitors? They wouldn't be impressed, they'd think you're pathetic for being so needy. Just the act of owning/coveting a trophy shows one as being so concerned with one-upmanship. A person doesn't need to throw it in anyone's face. Just the fact that you're willing to set aside storage space states this attitude.
    I'd agree that winning a tournament, or just doing well in one can be satisfying because it affirms that you've improved at something. You can always tell people about it. But is the purpose of the trophy to prove the claim? "See I really did win the Raspberry Tournament in '72". That behavior is self-defeating. Nobody will question such a claim, because nobody cares. Win for yourself, not to impress others.
     
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  44. drakulie

    drakulie Talk Tennis Guru

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    huh?

    you made a "type"????



    Practice what you preach much?
     
    #94
  45. Topaz

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    Exactly! And while probably nobody else would care (barring loved ones!), that is a personal goal and you will feel a great amount of achievement and satisfaction when you reach that goal.

    I'd rather set goals and not reach them than not even try.

    And yes, selfish is not always bad. I totally agree. So, it might be selfish of me to spend so much time on tennis and working on improving, but I've set a goal that means something to me. I get that it might not mean something to anyone else, but that doesn't mean they have to be a jerk about it, right?

    In my experiences, I have found that the ones who feel it is necessary to tear others down are those who are afraid to try and fail to reach their own goals. They are the ones that *need* to belittle others in order to feel better about themselves. We all know people like that...deep down inside they are scared and insecure.

    Uh, no, I don't show them to visitors...never said that I do. Nobody here on this thread has said that either. Pretty sure I've thrown it in anyone's face either.

    I also haven't belittled the accomplishments of others...because I know what it means to work hard toward a goal.

    You're getting hung up on the actual physical trophy there. You don't get a trophy for not doing anything...you get it when you accomplish something...thus it is a symbol of an accomplishment.

    Look back to the OP...this is a discussion point not because someone was boasting about their trophies...rather because someone was dissing others' accomplishments.
     
    #95
  46. Ripper014

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    I think it is like the saying...

    Been there, done that, have the trophy... whats next?
     
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  47. Xenakis

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    No Cindy had it right. In US English the 'period' should be inside the quotation (in British English it's called a full stop and it's placed outside the quotation, I use the American rules too as I think it looks better.)

    Regards the comma, not sure how you can justify that as more or less correct. It's a matter of style unless you can show it to be otherwise.

    Also strictly speaking we are talking about punctuation here, though the dividing line between grammar and punctuation is sometimes a little vague (punctuation is really a subset of grammar I suppose.)
     
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  48. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    Yup, I had it right, I think. I do, however, need to get a new keyboard. My kid uses this one while she eats grapefruit, and the thing is getting a bit unreliable, to say the least. I'm getting tired and going back to fix typing errors I'm pretty sure I didn't make.

    Actually, I think Drakulie is wrong on the comma usage as well. I believe you don't want the comma before the quotation marks if you aren't making a sentence or dialogue (although I wouldn't claim that is the entirety of the rule). So you would never write something like: The word is, "Wrong." But you would write: She said, "The word is wrong."

    Sure. Works for me.

    Anyway, Larry got to the bottom of things. Insulting someone's kids crosses a line -- especially when you are stomping into a perfectly nice thread to pick a fight. Maybe the moderators will deal with Drakulie someday, maybe they won't. Whatever. It is nice to know that a few TW members are willing to take this Drakulie person to task when it is richly deserved.

    As for me, I stand by my original statement: My kids *rock!* :)

    Cindy -- pioneering the use of the asterick as italics substitute
     
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  49. Cindysphinx

    Cindysphinx G.O.A.T.

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    You know, that *is* an interesting point. What is the point of a trophy? I mean, if you win a race or tournament or whatever, why isn't a handshake enough?

    Yet I know that if I won a tournament and they handed me nothing, I would wonder what had gone wrong. I say that even though I am not a pack rat.

    So why am I hanging onto this 2.5 ladies singles trophy? It has no value. Why not slam dunk it into the trash?

    I think it is because I fear it will be the only one I ever win -- quite likely because I don't play tournaments.

    Cindy -- who stopped road racing for many reasons, one of which was that she knew she would never, ever win so why not just go run by herself?
     
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  50. Steady Eddy

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    That's been my experience too. Also people who are quick to bring up their success to strangers are insecure.
    I'll take your word for it. I reread the OP and it sounds to me like it's about trophies. I recall reading in a football player's autobiography that he brought all his trophies with him to his college dorm. This caused for some problems with his relations with the other students. I can see a school displaying trophies on behalf of its students, they're proud of what their students accomplished. But displaying your own trophies...:eek:
    "it is" = "it's", and you're a teacher!
     

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