This is General Sir Andrew of Roddick of the Pure Drivers with an emergency message for any member of the Babolat Alliance whomst'd've fought alongside me in the epic battle of Woofer Grommet, whom endeavoured to uncover the mystery dubbed "The Curious Case of Cortex Corruption" and any who took to the skies with the BA High Command to rain down Aero Strikes upon the Wilsonian occupied land of BLX.
"It has been more than a decade now since I first joined the Babolat Alliance as a naive, fresh faced rookie of practically zero ability. I have been separated from my brotherhood for years. The last I remember I was drowning in mead and merriment at the Grand Tavern, my fellow cohorts engaged in entertainment of all sorts. I recall fond memories of our now retired commander in the field (and tavern) Sir Rosskins locked in a titanic arm wrestling contest with the infamous warrior Stosur. 'Damn you, Stosur! Just one more!' being the last thing I heard before everything faded to black."
"When I finally regained consciousness I had found the Grand Tavern exploded to smithereens. Strewn all over were bodies of Good Knights of the Alliance, my family had been torn from me. Birds and insects picking at the flesh of my lifeless comrades indicated that some time had past, I later learned that I had been lying there partially trapped under rubble for an entire fortnight. I swore vengeance upon the filthy Wilsonians, for surely it was they, our mortal enemy who had laid siege to our revered establishment. Without the strength and numbers of the Alliance I was forced in to hiding. I noted that all members of the High Command had vanished, nowhere to be seen amongst the carnage at the tavern. Were any of them alive?! I hid for years in the Foot-Fault Forest, anchored to the Village of Fischer. Living on a diet of tree bark and squirrel fur. Needless to say I found myself a hair's breadth from death when I was miraculously discovered and saved by the warrior Stosur. She had survived the attack on ye olde tavern and thinking me dead along with the rest, had fled the scene. With the Alliance destroyed, Stosur sought refuge with the Headonists. In fairness, they had been a tentative ally of The Kingdom of Babolatia. With no cause for quarrel between us, I agreed to follow Stosur to their camp in the Austrian Alps but not before heading to China. There I harboured a quantity of graphite. On our way to the alps I stopped in Lyon, home to the great deity Lord Eric of Babolat, who crafted for me an incredible Pure Drive sabre."
"In the years following the attack on GT I had lost plenty of muscle mass, once a hulking General of the BA I now resembled something akin to a Naked mole-rat. I'm not ashamed to admit that I piggybacked Stosur for the entire climb up the alps. She had not lost any of her rock solid musculature since last I saw her. In fact she had seemingly tripled in size. I pray you defeated her in that final wrestling of arms, Sir Rosskins, for any chance you had then has been crushed now by the python-like grip I experienced upon my thighs as I clung to the back of the warrior woman. We bundled in to the Headonist Encampment, exhausted. Sat around a campfire, covered by blanket and graciously slurping on noodle soup made not of noodles at all but rather the felt of Head tennis balls, the Headonists told me what had happened."
"Whilst we of the Babolat Alliance played out our era-spanning rivalry with the Wilsonian Empire, a new enemy had been born. Starting from humble beginnings, they had no allegiance of any kind. Outlaws, they banded together and one by one, ransacked various tennis institutions the world over. The Yonexians were the first to fall in an attack that shook the world. Next the Technifibrous Tribe, even the blasted Fischerites had been raided by a sect of these vagrants. The Kingdom of Babolatia was near destroyed, the attack on the BA being the very start of it all. As for the Wilsonians, Their empire is no more. I am a man of great stoicism, yet the news of my Kingdom sustaining immense, irreparable damage, combined with the memory of the Alliance literally blown apart before me, left me with tears spewing from my ducts with violence comparable to that of a volcanic eruption."
"This tragic story told to me by the Headonists was interrupted by the sound of a twig breaking. Raising my head I saw stood just off from our group a silhouetted figure against the crescent moon that was now dominating the horizon. Light emanating from our campfire licked at the figure of this person, it was then that I noticed the unmistakable presence of a Babolat Sabre slung to their waist."
"Stepping forward, the campfire hissed and spit, rising as if to greet this character. I could see him clearly now. Somewhat tall, a body of rather average build concealing an inordinate amount of power, I sensed. All rather interesting. Or not, as my attention was fully focussed on that weapon of Babolatian origin, The likes of which I had never seen before. The sight of the thing stirred within me a surging power that set my muscles alight! I stood up, all 8'4 of me and stormed toward the man. Grabbing the scruff of his neck I raised him off the ground so that we were face to face and bellowed with every ounce of my energy. Felt fluff from the soup that had been lodged betwixt my teeth along with copious saliva covered the poor soul, but I had to see what he was made of. Digging his heel into my anvil-like chest, he propelled himself away from me, executing a quadruple backflip before landing without hesitation in to a returner's stance. "THIS YOUNG WHIPPER-SNAPPER HAS MOXIE!!!" I exclaimed with utter delight. I unsheathed my Pure Drive and lifted it to point squarely at the young man, he hadn't moved from his stance. He was ready to receive serve."
"What ensued was five sets of elite-tier, maximum energy Tennis. Had I been at the peak of my powers, the match would have been over in no more than three minutes. Alas, what with my sickly disposition and no tie-break in the fifth, the match continued for a full ten weeks without pause before I was able to overcome the challenge of this peculiar specimen. With his bombastic movement and seemingly unlimited reserves of power, I felt inspired and the sparks of hope rattled within me. We've not lost this war yet. With the young man felled, my foot upon his chest to indicate my utter dominance and the Grommet Cap of my Pure Drive inches from his throat. He was unflinching as he faced death itself. I had seen enough."
"I offered my hand and helped the man to his feet, he told me his name: Lieutenant Dominic of Thiem. He had been granted the title by The Kingdom of Babolatia in the absence of the entire BA following the attack. Actually he had been tasked with finding the members of the BA High Command. In his travels he had found himself back in his homeland of Austria, how fortunate that he should stumble upon the Headonist's Encampment then and into me: General Sir Andrew of Roddick of The Pure Drivers. Once I had revealed my identity, Thiem fell to his knees and raised his arms high, tears streaming from his eyes as though he had in that moment won the mystical pineapple-topped trophy of legend."
"Thiem held key information, This new enemy called themselves The Next-Gen, lead by a wildish brute called Krygios. This beast had tapped in to a dark source of energy to gain skills the likes of which had never been seen before. Hell-bent on corrupting the entire planet, his mission is to relentlessly abuse officials, play underarm serves, fire brutal shots directly at innocent people, engage enemies in duels only to sulk and walk away mid-battle to then be seen wandering the streets at night frequenting taverns. HE HAD BEEN THE ONE TO INITIATE THE ATTACK ON THE GREAT TAVERN THAT FATEFUL DAY."
"So, here we are. Krygios and his band of merry Next-Genners must be stopped. Thiem has informed me that there is a resistance group fighting back. Just yesterday, I'm told that the legendary Babolatian warrior-god, Lord Rafael of Nadal Parera faced a full-frontal assault from Kyrgios and managed to defeat him. If this Kyrgios is so brazen as to openly attack a figure of such calibre in broad daylight, then it is vital that the Babolat Alliance reform once again to vanquish this evil!"
And so I call upon you all! To the High Command! Good Knights of the Alliance old and new! We need you! I need you! Stosur needs you! Let us reunite and rebuild, surpassing all that has come before and leading the The Kingdom of Babolatia into a new age! With the power of Thiem, With the belief of the Raging Bull Parera backing us, we can do this!!!
SO... WHERE ARE YOU?