Negative thoughts during tight matches. Help!

[Bobby Riggs]

Whenever a match is close I get overwhelmed with negative thoughts. I have tried deep breathing and bouncing on my feet to help loosen my body up, but as soon as I do negative thoughts seem to rush back into my head and tighten up my body again in a nano-second. After I lose it bothers me a lot. When I'm in a tight match I remember how bad I feel when I lose and that seems to make me me even more tense. I want to do anything to avoid the disappointment of losing. It only makes me more tense.

In the past I've had some real disasters during tight matches ( I'm a 3.5-4.0 player) but I've also won some tight matches. The only thing I seem to remember though are the bad things that happened. Why? What can I do to eliminate these negative thoughts affecting my play. Thanks for all advice.

 

[salsainglesa]

Remind yourself to play, it is just a game. Enjoy the playing

Any kind of introspection work could help, but its a long term commitment. Even if it has lasting benefits on all your life, there won't really be a quick fix.

 

[gpt]

I suggest that when you notice yourself starting to think this way, abruptly shift your focus to constructive/purposeful thinking.

Set yourself some short term tasks and focus on achieving them.

Such as, "I am going to get my first serve in and at the body and follow it in". "I am going to attack the first short ball I get". "This return is going to land beyond their service line"

If it doesn't turn out the way you planned, take pride in the fact that you gave yourself a challenge and that you stepped up with an objective in mind.

Keep focusing on set outcomes.
Repeat....

This way you will be thinking and playing forward not wasting mental energy on negative thoughts that put you in a mindset that says the match is out of your control

 

[MixieP]

Get yourself a copy of "The Inner Game of Tennis". Read it. And read it again, now and again. It helps, I promise.

 

[Mick]

i am more upset when the tennis pro whom i am rooting for loses the match on tv than when i lose a match

 

[Bobby Riggs]

Remind yourself to play, it is just a game. Enjoy the playing

Any kind of introspection work could help, but its a long term commitment. Even if it has lasting benefits on all your life, there won't really be a quick fix.

Sometimes I think I'm way too wrapped up in winning matches. I really wish that I could enjoy just playing more. On one level I realize that it's a game, but on another I think losing represents some kind of deficiency in me. I'm wondering if others are as bothered by losing as I am. It usually takes me two days to not feel awful about having lost a tennis match! Perhaps this is a bit pathetic for a guy in his 40's. I may well end up getting some kind of counselling for this if it continues, and I have no doubt it could help. Just trying to measure how bad my case is compared to others who play at a recreational level first before I decide what to do. Thanks for writing.

I suggest that when you notice yourself starting to think this way, abruptly shift your focus to constructive/purposeful thinking.

Set yourself some short term tasks and focus on achieving them.

Such as, "I am going to get my first serve in and at the body and follow it in". "I am going to attack the first short ball I get". "This return is going to land beyond their service line"

If it doesn't turn out the way you planned, take pride in the fact that you gave yourself a challenge and that you stepped up with an objective in mind.

Keep focusing on set outcomes.
Repeat....

This way you will be thinking and playing forward not wasting mental energy on negative thoughts that put you in a mindset that says the match is out of your control

I usually do try to shift my focus to the tactics that I should be using but I feel these negative thoughts running in the background. Weird, I know. I can be thinking "Serve down the middle, then go to the net" but I'm actually shaking as I'm telling myself this. That's how powerful my negative thoughts are, they grip me and almost immobilize me. In many ways I do feel that the match is out of my control, as you said. I have never really played aggressively with any success at these moments ( wild swings, terrible results,etc ). I usually just try to play extremely conservatively in tight matches and this usually results in my opponent hitting a winner off one of my pathetically tentative shots. I'm so afrais of losing it seems that I almost hand the match to my opponent. I will keep trying to shift the focus on tactics and hope that I can gradually block out more and more negative thoughts. I'm usually more of a counter-puncher but do you think it's better to play more aggressivelyin order to overcome my nerves when I'm in tight matches? Thanks for writing.

 

[BU-Tennis]

i am more upset when the tennis pro whom i am rooting for loses the match on tv than when i lose a match

I am the same way, but I used to get most nervous when I would watch my sister's matches.

 

[Bobby Riggs]

Get yourself a copy of "The Inner Game of Tennis". Read it. And read it again, now and again. It helps, I promise.

Long ago I looked at this book but I will revisit it to see what I can get out of it. I'll check out the book, but what do you think a player should be concentrating on at crucial moments of a match? How do you block out power negative thoughts? Thanks for writing.

i am more upset when the tennis pro whom i am rooting for loses the match on tv than when i lose a match

match

I know what you mean. Interesting, though, just watching Andy Murray fall apart recently when he was serving for the match in the 3rd set vs The Joker in Rome semis made me think that Murray may be really overwhelmed by negative thoughts at times. He really seems so dark, and almost consumed by fear and frustration, at crucial moments in big matches. I wonder what Nadal is thinking at the same juncture. Thanks for writing.

 

[hawk eye]

Just don't give a damn about the result, only play every point as well as you can.

If it you lose the point by an UE, only remind yourself that's all in the game and move on.
If you make 2 UE's in a row, remind yourself that it's all in the game and move on.
If you make 3 UE's in a row, remind yourself that it's all in the game and move on.
....
....
If you make 48 UE's in a row, game's over and move on (to a psychologist probably)

 

[TheBoom]

Someone posted this on a thread i made earlier and if i were you i'd watch it before a match to get pumped up or just for the heck of it. It is really motivational
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJf4USdb8lg

 

[Bobby Riggs]

Someone posted this on a thread i made earlier and if i were you i'd watch it before a match to get pumped up or just for the heck of it. It is really motivational
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJf4USdb8lg

Thanks, TB, good stuff. I will take your advice and listen to this before I play next.

 

[GuyClinch]

Set yourself some short term tasks and focus on achieving them.

Such as, "I am going to get my first serve in and at the body and follow it in". "I am going to attack the first short ball I get". "This return is going to land beyond their service line"

This. Live in the now - just don't forget the score. <g> Because your opponent will remember and then you start to get pissed that you think he cheated you haha.

 

[MixieP]

Long ago I looked at this book but I will revisit it to see what I can get out of it. I'll check out the book, but what do you think a player should be concentrating on at crucial moments of a match? How do you block out power negative thoughts? Thanks for writing.

There are quite a few practical tips in the book for how to deal with situations like those you describe.

 

[tennis_balla]

Winning Ugly is a good book as well, besides Inner Game of Tennis.

When you feel yourself get tight, concentrate on breathing. Its your best way out. Deep breaths in and out, nice and slow to calm yourself down. There's no best way out of it then that to be honest.
Also, when you get into those situations you could also go back and re-establish what your game plan was for that match. Whats been working and keeping your mind on that.
I've used things such as singing songs in my head when I was a junior, making sure my feet are loose and moving. Happy feet as Brad Gilbert calls it. To me it seems like you panic when you get into this situation. Slow down, take your time, concentrating on slow deep breaths to get more oxygen and take it one point at a time.
Besides, your opponent isn't feeling any better. They might be better at hiding it but no one is completely relaxed in a tight match so you're not alone, though it might feel that way (one sided)

 

[anchorage]

But you see this even at the highest levels of the game; players who, serving for the match, suddenly become less agressive etc, etc. The only way to overcome this is to keep getting into that position and prevailing. That's also something you see from the very best; they know they're never beaten 'til the last point (of course, they win most of the time anyway, which helps a bit).

Obviously, you can't let negative thoughts detract from your focus on what you're actually doing. Also, remember that the guy on the other side of the net is probably having the exact same thoughts despite his apparent tranquility.

So, if you're leading in a tight match, you've got the edge & he's the one playing catch up. Just work out how you're going to keep him down.

 

[salsainglesa]

Sometimes I think I'm way too wrapped up in winning matches. I really wish that I could enjoy just playing more. On one level I realize that it's a game, but on another I think losing represents some kind of deficiency in me. I'm wondering if others are as bothered by losing as I am. It usually takes me two days to not feel awful about having lost a tennis match! Perhaps this is a bit pathetic for a guy in his 40's. I may well end up getting some kind of counselling for this if it continues, and I have no doubt it could help. Just trying to measure how bad my case is compared to others who play at a recreational level first before I decide what to do. Thanks for writing.

I don't find it pathetic at all, its just that we are too judgemental and can't manage unfulfilled expectations. We take things as something personal, wich in reality are not.

Reminding one self that it is a process helps, its a game. Life is a process aswell, and you are at this point in your life, it is your own personal process wich by coincidence sometimes happens in a tennis court.

Whenever you find yourself making judgements accept you just had one. just by accepting them you will not continue to tense up, stoping the viscious circle.

 

[Bobby Riggs]

Winning Ugly is a good book as well, besides Inner Game of Tennis.

When you feel yourself get tight, concentrate on breathing. Its your best way out. Deep breaths in and out, nice and slow to calm yourself down. There's no best way out of it then that to be honest.
Also, when you get into those situations you could also go back and re-establish what your game plan was for that match. Whats been working and keeping your mind on that.
I've used things such as singing songs in my head when I was a junior, making sure my feet are loose and moving. Happy feet as Brad Gilbert calls it. To me it seems like you panic when you get into this situation. Slow down, take your time, concentrating on slow deep breaths to get more oxygen and take it one point at a time.
Besides, your opponent isn't feeling any better. They might be better at hiding it but no one is completely relaxed in a tight match so you're not alone, though it might feel that way (one sided)

I will keep trying deep breathing ( I do it now but perhaps not enough ). I do panic in tight situations and I'm not really sure why-- that hasn't always been the case. I hadn't really thought about how my opponent might be feeling and that's a good point: he's probably as worried as I am. Thanks, TB.

But you see this even at the highest levels of the game; players who, serving for the match, suddenly become less agressive etc, etc. The only way to overcome this is to keep getting into that position and prevailing. That's also something you see from the very best; they know they're never beaten 'til the last point (of course, they win most of the time anyway, which helps a bit).

Obviously, you can't let negative thoughts detract from your focus on what you're actually doing. Also, remember that the guy on the other side of the net is probably having the exact same thoughts despite his apparent tranquility.

So, if you're leading in a tight match, you've got the edge & he's the one playing catch up. Just work out how you're going to keep him down.

Very true about top pro players playing better in tight situations. So many matches come down to a few points, and time and again it's the top players who seem to escape tight situations. Of course there are upsets but I've seen so many matches where the top player ( even if he's not playing well ) just seems to handle the pressure far better than his opponent.

You're right about having been successful in tough situations being great things to have in your memory bank. I wish I had better memories from such situations. I will try to create more.

I wonder what college coaches tell their players about handling pressure situations.

I don't find it pathetic at all, its just that we are too judgemental and can't manage unfulfilled expectations. We take things as something personal, wich in reality are not.

Reminding one self that it is a process helps, its a game. Life is a process aswell, and you are at this point in your life, it is your own personal process wich by coincidence sometimes happens in a tennis court.

Whenever you find yourself making judgements accept you just had one. just by accepting them you will not continue to tense up, stoping the viscious circle.

That's good advice, Salsa. I lose sight of that all the time but it's very true. I do think that now that things are not going very well in my life off the court that this mindset takes over on the court where I'm basically just trying to have fun. I lose perspective on things on the court I guess.

 

[fuzz nation]

I'm sort on thinking along the same lines as our pal, salsainglesa; most every tennis player can benefit from a little self-examination. One of the very best things I learned from reading Vic Braden's book, Mental Tennis, was just how important it is for a tennis player to have his/her expectations in touch with reality. The odds that you're going to miss a ball at some point in the future are pretty much guaranteed, right? Expect those errors to happen. When they do, use them and figure out what to adjust.

When that voice in your head starts echoing thoughts like, "Don't lose" or "Don't screw up", you may feel like you're trying to buckle down, get tough, and grind out a win. In fact, you're focusing on losing and screwing up!!! This has to be one of the most common mental traps in all of sports. The good news? Half the battle is merely learning to recognize it. With this understanding of those gremlins and what they are for your head, it's not so likely that they'll just sneak in on you.

So back to that earlier point about expecting the errors. When they happen, you have to decide to make sense of them and stay positive. That's a lot easier to do when your expectations are reasonable and you avoid that left turn into the realm of high drama that typically leads you into that trap.

Understand that when the anger and frustration start creeping in, that's you making the decision to focus on the errors... and perpetuate them. That anger can't help you play well (unless you're hoping for an Oscar nomination). First recognize, then decide. And keep a little sense of humor in your bag while you're at it. As for your personal expectations as a tennis player, write them down and think them over. It could help you to stay happy out there.

 

[rosewall4ever]

I think of it simply as 4 point tally.i ie first to 4(in most cases). It causes me to think of my own game point by point rather than what my OP is doing. 80% of errors is for lack of concentration...

 

[thug the bunny]

I think you screwed yourself chosing your forum name. Wasn't he known for his (bad) attitude?

Seriously though, everyone feels negative emotions (anger is the most common) with poor execution. It's normal, so don't dwell on it. Focus on the task at hand. Whether it's golf or tennis, I never, never think of the big picture (the final result). Instead, I think shot by shot, point by point, hole by hole. Play well, and let the outcome fall where it may.