Dedans Penthouse
Legend
Came across a book yesterday entitled:
"Mike Haller's 'The Standup Comic's Guide to Success'." As it was an 11 page book, it was a pretty quick read, even for me; but a great book nontheless.
Bonus:
It also came with a CD of Mike "live" on stage at Der Comedy Club in Frankfurt-en-Mein. His very glum, dour delivery (and his thhickk Ch-German accent) made for one killer joke after another; this guy is a pro's pro who had the place in stitches.
You must, you absolutely MUST catch this comedic genius "live" if you ever get the chance. Below are some of his "gems" .... I know that in "written form" jokes get watered down, especially compared vis-a-vis his dazzling delivery (what a sense of humor this guy has!), but anyway, here goes:
N.B. "Punchlines" are itallicized
_______________________________________________________________
"Knock, knock!"
"Who's there?"
"The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband is in the hospital."
_______________________________________________________________
A man walks into a pub.
He is an alcoholic whose drink problem is destroying his family.
_______________________________________________________________
Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge?
She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low sense of self-esteem.
________________________________________________________________
What do you cal a cat with no tail?
A Manx cat.
________________________________________________________________
Why do undertakers wear ties?
Because their profession is very serious, and it is importatnt that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.
_________________________________________________________________
How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
One.
________________________________________________________________
Why do women fake orgasms?
Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.
________________________________________________________________
Two men are sitting in a pub:
One man turns to the other and says: "Last night, I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house."
The other man replies: "Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit."
________________________________________________________________
Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away;
One cow looks 'round a bit, eats some grass and then wanders off...
_______________________________________________________________
Why are there no asprin in the jungle?
Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest.
________________________________________________________________
Michael Haller: friendly, engaging, effervescent comic genius
"Mike Haller's 'The Standup Comic's Guide to Success'." As it was an 11 page book, it was a pretty quick read, even for me; but a great book nontheless.
Bonus:
It also came with a CD of Mike "live" on stage at Der Comedy Club in Frankfurt-en-Mein. His very glum, dour delivery (and his thhickk Ch-German accent) made for one killer joke after another; this guy is a pro's pro who had the place in stitches.
You must, you absolutely MUST catch this comedic genius "live" if you ever get the chance. Below are some of his "gems" .... I know that in "written form" jokes get watered down, especially compared vis-a-vis his dazzling delivery (what a sense of humor this guy has!), but anyway, here goes:
N.B. "Punchlines" are itallicized
_______________________________________________________________
"Knock, knock!"
"Who's there?"
"The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband is in the hospital."
_______________________________________________________________
A man walks into a pub.
He is an alcoholic whose drink problem is destroying his family.
_______________________________________________________________
Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge?
She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low sense of self-esteem.
________________________________________________________________
What do you cal a cat with no tail?
A Manx cat.
________________________________________________________________
Why do undertakers wear ties?
Because their profession is very serious, and it is importatnt that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.
_________________________________________________________________
How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
One.
________________________________________________________________
Why do women fake orgasms?
Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.
________________________________________________________________
Two men are sitting in a pub:
One man turns to the other and says: "Last night, I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house."
The other man replies: "Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit."
________________________________________________________________
Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away;
One cow looks 'round a bit, eats some grass and then wanders off...
_______________________________________________________________
Why are there no asprin in the jungle?
Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest.
________________________________________________________________
Michael Haller: friendly, engaging, effervescent comic genius
