How to Troll Effectively

Manus Domini · Feb 26, 2014

dParis said:
No. I'm saying they may have been hitting the crack pipe.

So God smokes crack? Well, Heaven will be more interesting than I thought. :twisted:

Spin Doctor · Feb 26, 2014

Sentinel said:
Please note that trolling is not as glamorous or lucrative as people think it is, and it;s only some really top-end trolls like myself who make millions. It involves a lot of hard work, and immense amounts of sacrifice of family, sex and other normal activities. It involves sitting in stuffy basements or attics for 220 hours a day living on Mountain Dew and Cup Noodles. I am unable to even spend my huge fortune.

Most trolls barely make ends meet. I suggest you take to pro tennis if you want a better life. Even in my dreams I have to think of nasty things to say to people. I wonder what the karmic results of all this will be. They say there is a special hell for us trolls, there's no connectivity in there. It's very hot and full of fire and brimstone, so i guess i will have to troll with smoke signals when I die.

Nice try but thou doth protest too much. I'm starting to think there actually is a LOT of money involved for very little work. If not money, then at least a lot of sexual satisfaction which is good enough for me. There are probably Troll groupies, swag at parties, etc.

You just don't want anyone horning in the action but I see through your little ruse.

Gut4Tennis · Feb 26, 2014

THIS IS THE best troll of all time. the GOAT
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0f-91fB8y-w

LYRICS:

OOOOO yo yo yooooooo
Yoo yoo yoooo yo yo yoooo
ooo ooo ooo ooo ooooooo yo yoooo
ya ya yaaaa ya ya yaaaa
ye ye ye ye ye yeyeyeyeyeye
o ho ho ho
ye ye ye ye ye yeyeyeyeyeye
o ho ho ho!
o oooooo o o ooooo
nanananananananananananananananana
na na na na na na na na na na na
nanananana!
NANANANANAAAAAA!
na na na...
na na naaaaa na na naaa
lol lol lol la la laaaa
la la laaaa la la laaaa
o o o o oooo o o oooo
ho ho ho ho ho
ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho
ho ho ho ho ho!
ah HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeEEEEEEEeeeee!!!!!
(really deep) lalalaaaaa la la laaaa
o ho ho ho hoooo
ba pa da da da do do do doooo
la la laaaa la la laaa
lalalalalala la la la la la la
lo lo lo lo lo looo
lolololololo lo lo lo lo lo lo
HAHAHAHAHA!
HOHOHOHOHO!
HOHOHOHOHO!
HOHOHOHOHO!
LALALALALALA-
LALALALALALA-
LALALALALALA-
LOLOLOLOL!
LAAAAAAAA
LO LO LOOOOOO
LA LA LAAAAAA
LA LA LAAAAAA
HO HO HO HO
LAAA LA LAAAA
LA LA LAAAAA
LAA LA LAAAAA
lalalalala la la la la la lol
ho ho ho ho ho!
lalalala (Waves) lo lo lo lo lo lo
ho ho ho ho hooooooooo!(Waves again)
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Manus Domini · Feb 26, 2014

Gut4Tennis said:
THIS IS THE best troll of all time. the GOAT
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0f-91fB8y-w

LYRICS:

OOOOO yo yo yooooooo
Yoo yoo yoooo yo yo yoooo
ooo ooo ooo ooo ooooooo yo yoooo
ya ya yaaaa ya ya yaaaa
ye ye ye ye ye yeyeyeyeyeye
o ho ho ho
ye ye ye ye ye yeyeyeyeyeye
o ho ho ho!
o oooooo o o ooooo
nanananananananananananananananana
na na na na na na na na na na na
nanananana!
NANANANANAAAAAA!
na na na...
na na naaaaa na na naaa
lol lol lol la la laaaa
la la laaaa la la laaaa
o o o o oooo o o oooo
ho ho ho ho ho
ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho
ho ho ho ho ho!
ah HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeEEEEEEEeeeee!!!!!
(really deep) lalalaaaaa la la laaaa
o ho ho ho hoooo
ba pa da da da do do do doooo
la la laaaa la la laaa
lalalalalala la la la la la la
lo lo lo lo lo looo
lolololololo lo lo lo lo lo lo
HAHAHAHAHA!
HOHOHOHOHO!
HOHOHOHOHO!
HOHOHOHOHO!
LALALALALALA-
LALALALALALA-
LALALALALALA-
LOLOLOLOL!
LAAAAAAAA
LO LO LOOOOOO
LA LA LAAAAAA
LA LA LAAAAAA
HO HO HO HO
LAAA LA LAAAA
LA LA LAAAAA
LAA LA LAAAAA
lalalalala la la la la la lol
ho ho ho ho ho!
lalalala (Waves) lo lo lo lo lo lo
ho ho ho ho hooooooooo!(Waves again)
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Napoleon XIV is better: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BROWqjuTM0g

Vcore89 · Feb 26, 2014

I'm too lazy (maybe even remembered wrong) to scour the internet but Diana Ross might have sung Amazing Grace with ''AHs'' only! Try to beat that.

Sentinel · Feb 26, 2014

Spin Doctor said:
Nice try but thou doth protest too much. I'm starting to think there actually is a LOT of money involved for very little work. If not money, then at least a lot of sexual satisfaction which is good enough for me. There are probably Troll groupies, swag at parties, etc.

You just don't want anyone horning in the action but I see through your little ruse.

"Very little work". Baah ! You noobs have no idea how many hours of our small lives we dedicated to opening and spamming each thread on a forum, sifting out intelligent from dumb poasters so we can trap the smart ones. Yes, we throw parties every time we get someone banned, we brag about bans etc. But only the cream gets invited. It depends on how many scalps you have. The Wolf of Wall Street doesn't compare to us. We are remorseless.

Manus Domini · Feb 27, 2014

Sentinel said:
"Very little work". Baah ! You noobs have no idea how many hours of our small lives we dedicated to opening and spamming each thread on a forum, sifting out intelligent from dumb poasters so we can trap the smart ones. Yes, we throw parties every time we get someone banned, we brag about bans etc. But only the cream gets invited. It depends on how many scalps you have. The Wolf of Wall Street doesn't compare to us. We are remorseless.

I wanna join your troll parties! How close am I in troll count?

Sentinel · Feb 27, 2014

Manus Domini said:
I wanna join your troll parties! How close am I in troll count?

It's a very close circle. You need some existing member to nominate you, especially a senior member. After ten years of merciless trolling, you may be promoted to a "made man" which means that no one can touch you, no other troll can get away alive if he messes with you, no matter which group he belongs to. Made men are untouchable. Each group has one leader, several made men and then the rest of follower trolls who are basically expendable and must troll at our beck and call if they want to live. But its a good life for them as long as they follow the rules. Even noob trolls are respected by the rest of the world and get our support when they get into any trouble with non-trolls (aka badfellas).

Manus Domini · Feb 27, 2014

Sentinel said:
It's a very close circle. You need some existing member to nominate you, especially a senior member. After ten years of merciless trolling, you may be promoted to a "made man" which means that no one can touch you, no other troll can get away alive if he messes with you, no matter which group he belongs to. Made men are untouchable. Each group has one leader, several made men and then the rest of follower trolls who are basically expendable and must troll at our beck and call if they want to live. But its a good life for them as long as they follow the rules. Even noob trolls are respected by the rest of the world and get our support when they get into any trouble with non-trolls (aka badfellas).

But you've only been on the forums since 2008. How did you get on the fast track?

Sentinel · Feb 27, 2014

Manus Domini said:
But you've only been on the forums since 2008. How did you get on the fast track?

If you read my early posts in this thread, i pioneered various forms of trolling. I experimented, I went into uncharted territories. I took on the big fellas, took them down and then replaced them (L.A Confidential like). I was the Al Capone of trolling. I was the Scarface, the John Dillinger of the internet world.

Manus Domini · Feb 27, 2014

Sentinel said:
If you read my early posts in this thread, i pioneered various forms of trolling. I experimented, I went into uncharted territories. I took on the big fellas, took them down and then replaced them (L.A Confidential like). I was the Al Capone of trolling. I was the Scarface, the John Dillinger of the internet world.

Nonsense. All your methods are tried and true. I suspect bribery plays a larger part than you let on.

dParis · Feb 27, 2014

Sentinel said:
"Very little work". Baah ! You noobs have no idea how many hours of our small lives we dedicated to opening and spamming each thread on a forum, sifting out intelligent from dumb poasters so we can trap the smart ones. Yes, we throw parties every time we get someone banned, we brag about bans etc. But only the cream gets invited. It depends on how many scalps you have. The Wolf of Wall Street doesn't compare to us. We are remorseless.

Manus Domini said:
I wanna join your troll parties! How close am I in troll count?

Sentinel said:
It's a very close circle. You need some existing member to nominate you, especially a senior member. After ten years of merciless trolling, you may be promoted to a "made man" which means that no one can touch you, no other troll can get away alive if he messes with you, no matter which group he belongs to. Made men are untouchable. Each group has one leader, several made men and then the rest of follower trolls who are basically expendable and must troll at our beck and call if they want to live. But its a good life for them as long as they follow the rules. Even noob trolls are respected by the rest of the world and get our support when they get into any trouble with non-trolls (aka badfellas).

Manus Domini said:
But you've only been on the forums since 2008. How did you get on the fast track?

Sentinel said:
If you read my early posts in this thread, i pioneered various forms of trolling. I experimented, I went into uncharted territories. I took on the big fellas, took them down and then replaced them (L.A Confidential like). I was the Al Capone of trolling. I was the Scarface, the John Dillinger of the internet world.

Manus Domini said:
Nonsense. All your methods are tried and true. I suspect bribery plays a larger part than you let on.

And these guys are discussing the meaning of life in another thread. Make of that what you will...

stringertom · Feb 27, 2014

Senti has morphed into the Tommy DeVito of TTW...I better not cross him or I might wind up like Spider!:twisted:

Hood_Man · Feb 27, 2014

If you want to learn how to troll effectively, listen closely.

Step 1.

Manus Domini · Feb 27, 2014

dParis said:
And these guys are discussing the meaning of life in another thread. Make of that what you will...

Trolling is life. The real question is, what is the meaning of trolling?

stringertom · Feb 27, 2014

Hood_Man said:
If you want to learn how to troll effectively, listen closely.

Step 1.

Glad you ranged down to <140 character mode. Keep it up!

meltedsteam · Feb 27, 2014

Sentinel said:
If you read my early posts in this thread, i pioneered various forms of trolling. I experimented, I went into uncharted territories. I took on the big fellas, took them down and then replaced them (L.A Confidential like). I was the Al Capone of trolling. I was the Scarface, the John Dillinger of the internet world.

Interesting.
One time I dreamt that I ate a giant marshmallow. When I woke up, my pillow was gone.

Vanhool · Feb 27, 2014

Chilling news. Computers to outsmart humans by 2029 and be capable of joking, flirting, etc. My mind quickly imagined a world where trolls create programs to troll for them, freeing up their time to...create even more trollbots. Soon these threads will be full of obnoxious nonentities picking fights with each other.
http://www.theguardian.com/technology/2014/feb/22/computers-cleverer-than-humans-15-years

Power Player · Feb 27, 2014

dParis said:
No, he probably wasn't a troll by textbook definition or the depiction in post #4 of this thread. He was more of a forum jerk. There was little baiting or cunning; more bombast.

God you are nailing it man..lol. Amazing assessments of these posters.

And yes, Bartelby is highly annoying and needs a lot of hugs.

Gut4Tennis · Feb 27, 2014

funny that Manus Domini is on my troll ignore list, and he starts this thread

perfect

Sentinel · Feb 27, 2014

dParis said:
And these guys are discussing the meaning of life in another thread. Make of that what you will...

I typed out a reply to this last night, but my BT keyboard froke out, so i had to shut down my spaceship. And that was very annoying.

Trolling Step 1: Use tried and tested hardware and software. Do not use experimental, bleeding edge or unstable components to troll.

Leave auto-correct and other such 5i55y stuff for wannabe tr011s.

Manus Domini · Feb 28, 2014

Sentinel said:
I typed out a reply to this last night, but my BT keyboard froke out, so i had to shut down my spaceship. And that was very annoying.

Trolling Step 1: Use tried and tested hardware and software. Do not use experimental, bleeding edge or unstable components to troll.

Leave auto-correct and other such 5i55y stuff for wannabe tr011s.

S3n71 iz 1337 7r011

PhrygianDominant · Feb 28, 2014

Manus Domini said:
S3n71 iz 1337 7r011

this is a serious thread about the m33n1ng 0f L1f3

check your l337 5P34k 47 7h3 d00r

Manus Domini · Feb 28, 2014

PhrygianDominant said:
this is a serious thread about the m33n1ng 0f L1f3

check your l337 5P34k 47 7h3 d00r

L337 7R0LL5 5P34|< L337 7R0LL 5P34|<

PhrygianDominant · Feb 28, 2014

Manus Domini said:
L337 7R0LL5 5P34|< L337 7R0LL 5P34|<

0100110100110101011001011100

Manus Domini · Feb 28, 2014

PhrygianDominant said:
0100110100110101011001011100

I DOAN KNOE BINARY!!!

Sentinel · Feb 28, 2014

Hey, i was just trying to prevent a word from getting starred out. No need to go all mathematical on me

I am experiencing the art of trolling the Life thread. Twist another persons words consistently, accusing him of not responding, keep twisting, bring in irrelevant facts and expect him to defend, put words in other people's mouths, misquote, quote out of context all the while pretending to be doing all this in good faith.

When the other person tires, accuse him of attacking you, or running away, of not having an answer, or all of these.

Trolling is not merely starting silly threads or saying something silly, which can be ignored.

KineticChain · Feb 28, 2014

HRB said:
I think we need to come up with a phrase for those who hide behind the phrase "troll"..i.e. the posters who, whenever faced with an opinion that contradicts theirs, simply brush off that person as a "troll" rather than debate their point!

How about "Spineless Poster"?:twisted:

THIS. this right here.

not very many people use the term "troll" correctly on TT. internet trolls are those who type things they don't really believe, for the sole purpose of stirring the emotions of others. arguing with someone and them not agreeing with you does not automatically make them a troll. that would be called differing opinions.

stringertom · Feb 28, 2014

Sentinel said:
Hey, i was just trying to prevent a word from getting starred out. No need to go all mathematical on me

I am experiencing the art of trolling the Life thread. Twist another persons words consistently, accusing him of not responding, keep twisting, bring in irrelevant facts and expect him to defend, put words in other people's mouths, misquote, quote out of context all the while pretending to be doing all this in good faith.

When the other person tires, accuse him of attacking you, or running away, of not having an answer, or all of these.

Trolling is not merely starting silly threads or saying something silly, which can be ignored.

sureshs is the master of silly threads that cannot be ignored..."Cinci is The Real Slam" has become a masterpiece of pawnage!

Sentinel · Feb 28, 2014

stringertom said:
sureshs is the master of silly threads that cannot be ignored..."Cinci is The Real Slam" has become a masterpiece of pawnage!

He is a valuable asset to this forum, you troll ! That thread is going deep into the anals of tennis history as a classic thread.

(p.s. i am trying to stir up your emotions, as per HRB's post).

stringertom · Feb 28, 2014

Sentinel said:
He is a valuable asset to this forum, you troll ! That thread is going deep into the anals of tennis history as a classic thread.

(p.s. i am trying to stir up your emotions, as per HRB's post).

sureshs will see what you did with your purposeful malapropism of a region of the body often visited by his own head and Nanal's right hand!:twisted:

Sentinel · Mar 1, 2014

stringertom said:
sureshs will see what you did with your purposeful malapropism of a region of the body often visited by his own head and Nanal's right hand!:twisted:

Purposeful ! How dare you !

It's like one now naturally types "poast" and has to consciously try not to put the "a". Similarly, he has ruined us for life. Every time i try to type "annals", I miss the second "n" without realizing it. Luckily, this is not a word i use often, especially when mailing my relatives.

I can also type "in world history" faster than i could when i was writing a 2000-volume series on the History of Intelligent Races in the Andromeda Galaxy several thousand millenia ago.

stringertom · Mar 1, 2014

Sentinel said:
He is a valuable asset to this forum, you troll ! That thread is going deep into the anals of tennis history as a classic thread.

(p.s. i am trying to stir up your emotions, as per HRB's post).

Very lost in this "poast" due to the malapropism I jumped into (phew!) was your original claim...I know he's an "azset" but I doubt he valuable!

Vcore89 · Mar 1, 2014

Creating annoyance threads is the most perfect and efficient way of trolling.

purple-n-gold · Mar 1, 2014

^^^ yes, far too many nuisance threads and always by the same tools.

Please keep it rolling senti and stringer...you guys are cracking me up

Solo · Mar 1, 2014

Take lessons from Clayqueen.

Manus Domini · Mar 1, 2014

purple-n-gold said:
^^^ yes, far too many of these nuisance threads and always by the same tools.

Please keep it rolling senti and stringer...you guys are cracking me up

I'm not a tool, am I?

purple-n-gold · Mar 1, 2014

Manus Domini said:
I'm not a tool, am I?

Not referencing you, namely that TDK entity.

Manus Domini · Mar 1, 2014

purple-n-gold said:
Not referencing you, namely that TDK entity.

Can I be an instrument, then?

stringertom · Mar 1, 2014

Manus Domini said:
Can I be an instrument, then?

All surgical instruments must be thoroughly sterilized prior to usage. Care to go through that???:twisted:

Manus Domini · Mar 1, 2014

stringertom said:
All surgical instruments must be thoroughly sterilized prior to usage. Care to go through that???:twisted:

I'd rather not be made sterile. Sounds painful.

*Grabs an area that should not be named.*

stringertom · Mar 1, 2014

Manus Domini said:
I'd rather not be made sterile. Sounds painful.

*Grabs an area that should not be named.*

"Since that day, I've been half I've ever been." Rudolph Peterson in "Judgment at Nuremburg", stunningly portrayed by Montgomery Clift.

Manus Domini · Mar 1, 2014

stringertom said:
"Since that day, I've been half I've ever been." Rudolph Peterson in "Judgment at Nuremburg", stunningly portrayed by Montgomery Clift.

What's it about?

Manus Domini · Mar 1, 2014

Manus Domini said:
What's it about?

Probably the Nuremburg Trials, you dip ****

Manus Domini · Mar 1, 2014

Manus Domini said:
Probably the Nuremburg Trials, you dip ****

Sorry that I'm a f***ing idiot.

stringertom · Mar 1, 2014

^^^Autotrolling at its best!:twisted:

Manus Domini · Mar 1, 2014

stringertom said:
^^^Autotrolling at its best!:twisted:

Nah, MD can't autotroll for sh1t.

Manus Domini · Mar 1, 2014

^I can, too!!!

Manus Domini · Mar 1, 2014

Oh, STFU. Now you sound like a whiny little kid.

OK, I'm done :lol:

stringertom · Mar 1, 2014

^^^May I suggest a new career path? The two of you will be sensational in ventriloquism! Penn & Teller should also be nervous!

Have you also thought about hacking Senti's and sureshs' accounts???

How to Troll Effectively

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